Δευτέρα, 30 Αυγούστου 2010

Here I am yet again...

Yes, I have not been on line... But I have been writing. And I have made some powerful decisions. September is going to be full of changes.



Saturday 28 August 2010
Kleo gave birth last night! We have been waiting for Kleo to give birth almost the whole of August. I had started to believe that she’s not going to have her baby before I leave… But last night everything was ready. The moon came up and she was there, far from the other horses in a corner of the field and she was in labour. We where all watching from a distance so as to not disturb the mother and child…
Moments of magic. Moments of nature doing what she has to do. The foal got up on it’s feet and mommy was helping it stay up. And then she led it to drink some milk. And it did! The newborn found the way to move. We where lucky to have the moon’s light above us. Amanda and Stathi where there for Kleo. They kept the other horses away, gave the mother water and food. I was siting there in the dark and watching the four of them… They are really a family… We were all very silent.
Kleo and her mum Artemis where given to Amanda and Stathis years ago. Kleo was totally unhandable. And she was raised with patience and love. And now she is the most adorable creature in the world. She is not scared of people and comes up to humans for a cuddle. This was her first baby and she was a bit unaware of what was happening to her. But it all turned out very nicely.
Another gift before I go. This place has been like a womb for me. A womb to start giving birth to my own personal journey. A place where love, patience and acceptance rule. I am leaving and I have all these images and feelings which will be there for the rest of my life.
Thursday 26 August 2010
I just lost a post. There you go. Probably I did not want to share all that was in it… All the crying and the goodbyes to the horses…
It’s all set. My trip to Italy. I am going to leave my flat in Athens and sort out my possessings. And on the end of September I am leaving for a farm in Northern Italy. I will probably take my dog with me.
So, I am waiting for the opposite polarity. The universe will check my decision. Is it strong enough, or am I going to be a coward and not do what my heart really wants? And the opposite polarity is here. The little flat that was giving me a little bit of money is unrented. I was informed today that I have no income whatsoever.
On the other hand I have faith. That everything will go as planned. I will find solutions to do what I want to do. I have to make some money. I have to use all this writing that flows from me to make some money. I have to be self dependent to be able to live my life the way I want to live it.
There is something inside me that tells me everything will be ok. I WILL NOT panic. I am strong and I will find the solutions. As long as I have faith in myself.
Monday 23 August 2010
I have not turned my computer on in a week. I guess when you are in nature you don’t need to use it every day. And I have a lot on my mind.
First, the weather has cooled off. Great strong winds have come from the north and the unbearable heat is over. It smells like autumn although it is not here - not yet. I wake up in clear, crispy mornings and in the night the moon is big and shiny. I feel that the time has come to leave the farm. The circle is almost complete. There is sadness in it. I don’t want to stay here anymore, not because I do not like it, but because I have done whatever I came here to do. I decided I am not a “horsy” person, which means I will never be crazy about riding and horses, but horses have given me the freedom and strength I needed. I am not scared of horses anymore. I’m not scared of freedom.
I will try and accept my sadness. Live with it for a while, instead of doing what I always did. I used to be angry when I left a place because I did not want to feel the painful sadness. If I was angry I would have a reason to leave somewhere. But not now. Slowly and tenderly I will detach from the farm and its people and its animals. They will have a place in my heart always.
New adventures lie ahead. New people and pictures and smells. But they are not welcome yet, because I have to deal with this little grief that is behind the leaving. A week remains. As August ends, I am not the same person. I have lived with horses, something I have never done before in my life. I saw their beauty in the lines of their bodies. I hugged them and kissed them. I saw them being born. I felt the same air that goes through their manes and tales. I was sleeping under the same starry sky as they did. I saw them running and fighting and playing. I learned a lot about them. Maybe sometime in the future I might understand why I was here in the summer of 2010. But I will never forget.

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