Τετάρτη, 22 Σεπτεμβρίου 2010

Parents

Mom Marika and foal Sylvia
My parents are like the waves in the sea. They come, splash into my heart's shore and go.

They have a wild child. They feel very unfortunate. Because they have a child who dares to dream of travelling around the world. They feel devastated. They feel abandoned. They feel very unfortunate because all these years they bred and supported a girl who does not want a family, does not want kids, does not want security, does not want to follow tradition. I try to feel compassion for their saddness and terror.

Right now they are playing an ugly game. A game of power and control. They are trying hard to make me change my mind. They are using all the ugly tools they have. They threaten me with financial abandonement. What they said was mine when I was doing what they accepted, will not be mine anymore. They want back all their gifts. Their material gifts I mean. Although I cannot understand this behaviour, I try to keep my cool.

No, I do understand this behaviour. They want their obedient child back. They want a child they can control.

They do not want an adult child.

And right now I feel the anger. I am so pissed off with them, my head is bursting!

It's difficult to forgive when you're pissed off. It's difficult to be gracious when you're pissed off.

So I'll stay pissed off. And use the force of my anger creatively.
I will create my departure to a heart's dream.

To travel around the world.

Thank you.

4 σχόλια:

  1. my dear elina.
    your parents are reflectors of old beliefs in you.lighten your baggages...with love.
    u are the u-niverce!
    enjoy your heart,antonis

    ΑπάντησηΔιαγραφή
  2. Όπως έλεγε και ο παπούς μου "καλύτερα να μετανιώσεις για κάτι που έκανες παρά για κάτι που δεν έκανες". Σου εύχομαι καλό ταξίδι!

    ΑπάντησηΔιαγραφή
  3. Elina, congratulations for embracing your anger and for using its power to create your own unique dream, to create joy in your life, rather than judging your anger.
    This is true healing! Forgiveness will come naturally, as you create joy in your life.

    Keep dreaming, keep loving, keep laughing, keep travelling, keep being you!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Afroditi

    ΑπάντησηΔιαγραφή